1. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
If things have been challenging for you both and you’re not where you want to be, or you’re not experiencing a good marriage, take responsibility for the change that needs to happen. One option is to put all of your partner’s problems and mistakes under a microscope. The other option, is to use a mirror and take a look at yourself.
The signs of a good marriage are when you have the ability to see beyond your own disappointments and understand how your actions have impacted your partner.
Is it time to get out of the blame game?
It feels natural to go on the defensive when things get confrontational, but successful marriages are ones where the couple accept the part they played in the disagreement rather than blaming their partner. This takes the heat out of the argument and refocuses the attention where it belongs.
Change is possible, but the best kind of change starts with you.
If you haven’t grabbed our Marriage Playbook which is full of marriage advice yet, can I recommend you do that? It will be the best investment into your marriage and yourself you can make.
2. BUILD INTIMACY
Whether you’ve been in your marriage for six months or 60 years, intimacy is the heartbeat of your relationship. Often, we think of intimacy as sex, but it’s so much more than that.
Emotional intimacy is where good connection starts, it’s about the interactions outside of the bedroom, too. Communicating and getting sound marriage advice about your feelings, needs and dreams, supporting each other and building trust, spending quality time together all build a deep sense of trust.
Physical intimacy is a powerful gift for a couple. A romantic touch, affection, and sex will set off the spark that is needed to feel close and connected as a couple.
These two forms of intimacy work hand in hand, as a couple invest time filling each other’s emotional love tank, sex and passion become the natural result of that loving and caring relationship.
3. GROW THROUGH COMMUNICATION
Somebody once said: In a good marriage you either grow or you learn.
We all make mistakes and hurt each other through our words and actions, purposefully or by mistake. It’s through those challenges that we become better at communicating and in the process, learn more about each other.
Healthy communication is the foundation of a great marriage. Feeling safe enough to share your feelings, needs, and your perspective is where understanding begins.
With honest and transparent conversations, we allow our mistakes to become monuments to our growth.
Good marriages become great when the couple recognizes that every relationship is a journey. We stand at the altar as two imperfect people with hearts that love, and hearts that can be broken. There will be good times and bad, but we don’t give up. By learning to love our wife, and love our husband, we grow and become stronger.
4. FORGIVE OFTEN
This is one of the most important piece of marriage advice. Forgiveness is the gift that we spend a lifetime giving. As Ruth Bell Graham said, “A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.”
Couples that don’t practice this powerful truth end up angry and bitter. Couples who do put in the effort and get sound marriage advice bring healing to their marriage.
We’re all guilty of hurting each other at times. Forgiveness is the gift you give each other that allows your relationship to have a fresh, new start. It is the foundation on which you will keep building the marriage of your dreams!
Fiona Leeworthy is a Counsellor & Family Therapist, and her husband Rick is a business owner and inspiring mentor in the Albury/Wodonga area; together they are the founders of Unbreakable Love. Their goals are to provide support, marriage advice, and inspiration for couples wanting to strengthen their relationship through their private Facebook group, relationship courses, marriage books and their latest app, Spark.
Their marriage book, The Marriage Playbook was released in 2021 to support couples with daily steps to ignite passion and connection in their relationship. The Marriage Playbook has compelling topics to discuss, with questions and tips that will deepen a couple’s intimacy and inspire them to build a healthy marriage.